Moral Argument

I don’t think I’m capable of happiness anymore, at least not on my own, luckily I feel empathy. I’m only ever experiencing the happiness of those around me. I like to think this was a positive deleopment. now I have to help others to feel any sense of joy. I don’t know maybe I should write more blog stuff, maybe if people read this and enjoy it, I can experience their enjoyment, or maybe I should try to start a charity. I feel like I’m being selfish either way, I’m not trying to help anyone but myself, you’re all just rungs on the ladder to my happiness. I am using each and every one of you when I tell a stupid joke and you giggle or confess an emotion and you experience relief at not being the only one. Am I a good person? Is it better for me to be miserable rather than act selfishly? Or is the effect of my action more important than the motivations? Why would I know?


Note To Self

Note to self:
Be nice. I mean it this time. I know you think you’re being nice but you’re not…
Stop hurting people’s feelings, stop making everyone think you don’t care. I know you think you’re trying but you’re not trying hard enough.

Just be nice, call your old friends once in a while, stop ignoring the new friends so much. Have you even bothered to text half of your aunts?
Why do you do this? You try so hard to be a good person, but where is your effort even going? Do you have some deep flaw you must supress?
Maybe, maybe… Why can’t you just be nice?
There are people you haven’t spoken to in months, family and friends, don’t you think they worry about you? They probably think you hate them…
Just be nice, how hard is that? Just a thought, keep it in mind. Try to be more mindful